Roadtrip and bub turns one

12th May last year we met our 5th child, our 4th son.
Now one and standing alone and wanting to eat so much more than just what I am offering. He points and claps, says Dad (his dad is pleased!) and is still a baby to me!

We went to Queensland and it was a great roadtrip. Certainly I think the kids didn't enjoy it so much as I did. They like to see new places as long as they don't have to travel! We spent 3 days driving up to Queensland which was fine as they slept a great deal. We spent 6 nights on the Gold Coast also visiting Brisbane. On the way home we visited Coffs Harbour, Sydney and Canberra among other stops. Just last night Av rep so he is slowly getting nearer to grading for next belt in Karate.

Chess and dominoes

 http://instagr.am/p/J7HFj_xmVA/

My daughter had been wanting some more clothing and having put her off for a few weeks to having to pay off the car registration, we finally had the chance to go to a few local opportunity shops. She managed to find an outfit she adores - cosplay is a term (as far as I understand it) used to describe costume play for people to dress as anime characters. The outfit consisted of cap, cardigan, tee, skirt, knee high socks and shoes. She did very well, I thought. I also scored Chess set, a set of dominoes, plus wetsuit. N set out to learn how to play Chess a couple of months ago and enjoys to play. The dominoes a hit too and I m going to have to get more.

My daughter is finding her time out of school a success and has no plans to return. She is enjoying drawing which is fantastic as she has a real talent for it that I believe went along the wayside as the school didn't do art so much.

N turned 9 last Sunday. I know these days, hospitals are evicting babies before they are ready but I felt no pressure to have an induction and went into spontaneous labour with him at 42 weeks. It was an exhausting pregnancy but with no morning sickness to speak of, it was at least more bearable than my other pregnancies. We had just moved house and he decided to join  us. It was a difficult labour for me, I had a midwife constantly at my side making me feel incredibly uncomfortable. I really wanted her to leave. She discussed baby names and circumcision with my husband and while I was in transition suggested I get dressed. I had a borderline third degree tear and I suffered for the first 6 weeks as if I was nauseated. I was advised to have a c-section with subsequent babies but at the time thought 2 children would be enough.

I am wanting him to homeschool but he is not as keen so I am trying my best to support him as I am worried he is starting to feel conflicted. I think he has realised you don't need school to learn but enjoys even if it is boring, repetitive and easy for him. Or as he told me today "Its in the realm of ordinary." He is an autodidact and has the ability to discover things and learn on his own. Most of what he tells me goes over my head, being science and maths based.

J likes to write out J with the dominoes in 'monster' and other sizes.

Births

Unfortunately I am not keeping out with the blog, so much happens and I forget.
 I have felt inspired to update the blogs of my freebirthed babies with finally Day's montage.
 Day's birth
 As well as  photos to show how much J has grown over the past few birthdays (3rd,2nd,and 1st). He now has shorter hair and talks in sentences. Strong for a reason is my bet. This year he will be 4. He is often asked if he goes to school or Kinder sohe must look much older. At this stage we plan for him tobe homeschooling alongside his big brother. I am feeling confident about my children not going to school. We are slowly building upanetwork of likeminded parents and that has helped agreat deal. We even had a chat with a local who is considering homeschooling. Three of his children are at the same high school as my daughter and he isn't impressed with them either.

I am reminded why I don't blog too often, I ramble....

The birth of Freckle has been on my mind in most recent days. I was able to attend the blessingway and having some purple threads tied around my wrist helps me think of it.
I made the precious boy a breastfeeding beanie and I was honored to see it on him in some gorgeous photos.

I have been sporadically knitting and crocheting and my stash has dwindled. I have been busy and quite distracted doing various things.
My big girl turned 12 towards the end of February, she maturing in many ways, her hormones prove to me she is not a little girl. We went to a vegan cafe for lunch on her birthday.

I remember my daughter's birth.I remember the morning sickness  I suffered during the pregnancy, how strange it seemed that antenatal care seemed pointless, how the doctors wanted me to abort our much wanted child in the case she may have a chromosomnal abnormality like my sister had. I remember how I was ignored through the labour and how they took over as my baby crowned and treated me with such disrespect that I didn't understand.  I had no expectations or even a birth plan. I tore and the doctor took so long to repair it and this was a source of trauma for me as well as possibly the shock. I found the emotions of being a new mother incredibly overwhelming.

My girl was born chubby and so healthy.

Such a gorgeous little soul, I look back and wish I enjoyed those moments more.I was unwell when she was a baby possibly due to the birth and depression. I had Graves disease and when she was a toddler, I had surgery to remove my thyroid.

I feel have made so many mistakes but I don't know it all and I will continue to learn.

My big boy is 8

My boy is 8 now. I love what he wanted for his birthday, new clothes and lunch at the vegan cafe GloHealth. He is my least demanding child, always grateful for what he receives, still quite sensitive and thoughtful. Its amazing how different all my children are and I appreciate all their qualities.

See my boys. My younger boys seem to be more rough and like to wrestle, and to do more things together. They have been bonding more lately which is always a joy to see as a parent.

My middle boy is now yellow belt. I was excited for him to go to his grading but then on the day I had pre labour that seriously stopped me in my tracks. This pregnancy has left me clueless or maybe its just teaching me how unpredictable life and birth can be.

The holidays were fun though we didn't do too much in the first part. Easter was a non event as we were most excited about celebrating my son's birthday.

I have been knitting a little.
A vest for my youngest son.

 Bonnet in red llama yarn.
After preparing the tallboy I realise that I went overboard creating for the little one. What's new. So I am trying to make non newborn stuff now.

Knitted crane for Japan.

Hotshot for bub in Summer, knitted in cotton fleece.

Double stranded Versa with star buttons from the Bird and the Fish.

Now I am slowly but surely getting organised for the birth of our fifth child, I am feeling fine and I am just enjoying the last days (I don't think it will be more than a month but in May) of the family dynamic as it is.

Av has learned the alphabet, knows all the letters and can write the capitals and lower case. He can count to ten and extended himself to add small numbers together. He can also count to Japanese to ten. This is what he  wanted to learn for himself.
Meanwhile J has been picking up a few new words and saying them more clearly than he has older words. We are having a townhouse being built in the backyard which is interesting to see happen on a weekly basis. J says "House" and "Dirt"

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Its my birthday present! Lame maybe but I like that I can make something for myself. Made from Karaoke soy/wool.

I have been making many things for the baby. I am not buying much at all, I don't need to. Above is J holding Junior in Victorian baby's cape crocheted in Karaoke soy/wool. He notices babies now and calls them 'bay'.

Receiving blanket in soy with corn edging. Think I will enjoy using this. I love making blankets but babywearing and co-sleeping usually means you don't often use them.
Lots of crochet baby things...

The yarn is fair trade and organic alpaca 4ply dyed to be a gradual gradient in Gypsy Rainbow colourway by Jolly Jumbuck, which was lovely but maybe not the best choice with the pattern. Without a diagram I couldn't work out the pattern so I made it my own way. Its very long using 110grams but hope it may be useful.

Have been knitting too...

Dreamerz organic cotton/milk singlet.

This Versa for J. I hadn't made anything for him in a while so it was sad when he didn't show much enthusiasm for trying it on. Versa is a fun pattern though so I am glad to see it in action.

Finally finished putting the squares I made in 2010 together, 16 crocheted and 4 knitted.

Also another WIP finished. Most of the work for this bath mat was in tearing up the sheet to be crocheted.

Also been working on my embellishing which I am quite happy with. I think organic wool is a joy to do needlework with as opposed to cotton which I struggled to do.

As for what our family have been doing, the children have been enjoying spending time playing with the neighbours. They often play together since we moved here but even moreso lately. They go to different schools so I think that is a good thing. Not that they are in same grades anyway. Av is younger and being 5 is asked if he is going to school. Thankfully he is happy to stay home and learn as he has been in the past 5 years.

This week we took the kids bowling as they sometimes enjoy doing. J loves it too. Here they are playing air hockey which is a fun pasttime too.

We had our first family BBQ! I am vegetarian so its not as exciting as it was for the kids and hubby! Rye bread around sausages with fruit/veg juice to wash it down.

On Australia Day (Invasion day) we decided to take the kids to Eureka Skydeck. They know the building well and spot it whenever we are near the City. Last time we went there was also Australia Day 2 years ago when J was only a small baby. This time we went in the evening. I think many people had the idea to watch the fireworks from a new height.

Since I am posting photos and most of my photos lately have been cruddy (can I blame the camera?) so I want to share this one which is offensive to children apparently. That is why my children think its normal and wonderful, right?

Witnessed in our house by children for almost 11 years. "Some Western person say that's disgusting...." This is the longest I have breastfed for (28mths and counting) and I can't see what the fuss is about. Not to say its not challenging because to me it really is, yet its normal. Full stop.

Little boy gets big, turns 5

I now only have one child under 5, life should be easy! But though the children may be slightly less demanding especially on a 24 hour basis, attitudes take over, they become their own people and headstrong people come up to battles! They can certainly have their own arguments that I do not wish to be a part of, eg. He took my toy...She stole my pencil....He scratched me...


Anyway, it it wonderful to see my children grow and learn. When a birthday comes up, its a good opportunity to look back and see how much they have grown and learned. Av turned 5 on November 2nd. All he wanted was toys, especially Transformers. We bought him 2 plus How to train a Dragon DVD. He is a fan of dragons. I also had new clothes for him but he complained he didn't get enough. He liked his new outfit.
He wasn't keen on going out so we took it easy at  home though we did go out for lunch. I helped the big kids make a cake and that was a surprising success. I love seeing the skill it takes to make creative cakes but how pleased was I that I can still remember how to make a basic one! No we don't bake much.

We had a surprise birthday party just with us and Nanna so he could have fairy bread and balloons.

My littliest boy turned 2!

My littliest boy turned 2 about a fortnight ago on the 21st September.

We are still breastfeeding, albeit only once a day. This is my doing, not his wanting because I am having a hard time with my health in particular. Anyway I am very happy he is 2 and having the good stuff.
We spent the day basically eating! For lunch we went to Pancake Parlour and then all you can eat for dinner. It was way too much food but it was fun. J adored having his Dad's hand to hold and the cuddles. I didn't really get a look in.

He loved the cake. The day before, Av really talked up the birthday cake.

Just an update on the knitteds I completed last month. I haven't knitted much since as I have been too unwell.
This was a test knit called Elisaac sweater. It is knit in 8ply Woolganics and Yarn Cafe.

Finally finished a Little Hoodlum for J with Yarn Cafe.

And its so nice to have some warmer weather. There are flowers everywhere saying Hey Its Spring.

Av's yellow and blue blanket

Av's blanket for his birthday made 6months early. He requested a yellow and blue blanket but I ran out so I added more colours. Its narrow and long but it should still be fine for him to use.

My daughter in double figures (includes my memories of her birth)

 

My firstborn wearing a cloth flat under a Fluffies pilcher at one week - first trip in the pram.

If only I had known I could have knit her soakers.

 

At 4months we loved her screw on arms. I breastfed my daughter til she was 11.5mths. I was devestated I couldn't feed her til a full year.( I actually thought you breastfed til 1 year, no more no less.) I weaned because she was biting but I do wish I had persevered.

  

 She is still my princess, into all things pretty and fancy. I allow her to like what she likes even though I may not relate or understand.

 

So she is now 10. Amazingly confident and friendly, I am happy to see her grow into the person she needs to be. I want her to be happy. There is nothing else I could wish more for. To be successful or healthy or rich, its all secondary to being true to yourself and finding true happiness.

As she becomes a woman I want to be there for her, answer her questions and listens to her concerns.

When my daughter was born it was all so new to me. I did what I thought I should. Breastfeed and use cloth. But I didn't use my instinct as much as I should have. I was listening to others and going against my instinct. She desperately wanted to co - sleep and everyone was telling us that was wrong. She ended up co sleeping with her Dad until we had our third child when she started to co -sleep with her eldest brother. She adored becoming a big sister. It was the first time she told me she loved me. I know she loves her brothers very much even if they annoy her!

I had a very uncomfortable pregnancy with my daughter. I had no idea what it would be like and I was feeling very unwell where I could barely do anything but sleep for the first trimester. Giving birth was a relief. On the day she was born, my husband was at work, only starting 2 days before (and a day after she was due). I had had cravings for icecream through the pregnancy and on this day I walked to the shop a second time for another. When I walked back, my husband met me. At that time he was casual, so he came home at about 2.15pm. He wanted cordial so we went back to the shop (about 5-10 minute walk). I was feeling twinges but was unsure what it was. I had a bloody show and told my husband. He jumped up out of the beanbag and we embraced excitedly yet nervously.

Not really sure what we were to do, we went to my mother in law's place. We had just moved to our new place (we had been living with my MIL for about a year) and hadn't had the phone on. No one was home so we broke in (tsk tsk) and used the phone. MIL was at Bingo. I called my Mum. I was having contractions while we spoke and she suggested we get to the hospital because I could barely talk. 

I had terrible contractions in the car and grimaced and gripped the upholstery. At the Royal Women's Hospital, I was met by a midwife who asked to see my pad and then left. I had no idea what to do, so took off my underwear. She came back and must have approved that I was in labour. ( I didn't have a bloody show with J so the idea that all labours, births and women are different must be tough to deal with hospital policy huh?) So I was moved to another room for monitoring, again testing to see if I was actually in labour. My MIL and SIL were at the hospital and I started to worry that they would want to watch me give birth and being in the discomfort I was, I didn't want that. 

I was moved on to the labour ward, where I was basically left alone. At the time I thought it strange but in retrospect it was the best way. I had no idea what to expect or what was happening but that may have been a good thing. My husband was fantastic in helping me in the shower. Water on my belly and then on my back, and it was wonderful dealing with the contractions.

The midwife came in as I felt these strange sensations, I was pushing. I just went with it and thought within myself, Don't let on! I didn't want to leave this space and it was all going well. I don't think the hospital would want me to give birth in the shower. The midwife wanted to give me an internal to see how far dilated I was. I stepped out of the shower. Splat! Oh that is was what it looks like when your waters break.

In a tiny towel, big belly, baby's  head in birth canal, I was rushed across the office with strange eyes watching me. Told to lie on the bed, I did. I was pushing without any control.I screamed and it felt awesome. It was the best pain relief. I even laughed to hear myself like that. I met one lovely midwife who stood at my side not at my vagina and held my hand. But the next midwife who had just came on the new shift was cranky and told me to stop yellling, its not helping. She had no idea. That horrible stinging feeling as baby crowned. Floppy arms and legs felt weird. What a relief! She was out. Born on 24th February 2000 at 10:12pm.

I was expecting a boy but I was so happy the same. I had a baby!

Jabbed with a needle in the thigh, they may have told me it was to help the placenta to come out. I felt so anxious to get the placenta out. It was like I was still in labour and I felt so nauseated. I had a second degree tear that took an hour and a half to repair. The dr came in to do that and I had my legs up in the stirrups and they felt so weak and cold. I couldn't help but scream, it was awful. The Dr said he couldn't work if I was screaming so I was forced to take the gas. I could still feel the needle going through but my head was light and it was just bearable.
When I went to have a shower, I was amazed at the uneven weight. Felt like I was pregnant forever and to lose the belly and feel my full breasts, was an interesting unbalanced feeling!

I would say it was close to a perfect labour and birth. I was left alone for most of the labour and my body and my baby did what we had to do. In retrospect I can see people got in the way and made it more difficult.

I found it difficult to sleep afterwards on the ward. I was on a high from giving life to this little person. We called her Talia but she was "my girl" It took a while to realise she was mine. I wasn't used to hospital, it was my first hospital stay and I felt like an inconvenience being there let alone asking for anything. I was hungry and tired and happy to go home. I couldn't bear to be without her for the first year. It didn't feel right and then when she was about 2 to 3 she was my best friend. 

At 16mths she was asking to go to school. She loved Nursery as a toddler and Kinder, finally going at 4. Now in Grade 5, where as the time gone. At times it felt so slow especially when I was unwell in the first year or so of her life (I had Graves disease which wasn't diagnosed til she was about a year old) but now with our life with three more crazy kids and time rushing by, it seems so sureal to think of what is was like, spending our days together, just me and her when her Dad was at work.

I love my daughter so very much, she made me a mother and she has helped me to become a Mum.